"Exploring Life's Journey with Euney Marie Mata Perez: Embracing passion, purpose, and the pursuit of personal growth. Join me as I navigate life's twists and turns with resilience and joy."
Over the weekend, I joined a retreat on The Power of Radical Kinship, by Fr. Greg Boyle, SJ.
Fr. Greg spoke so clearly and powerfully, in a gentle and beautiful way, on how we are God’s delight; on how wholeness, not perfection, is the journey that God wants us to experience and to be, on how love conquers all and finds its way, even in the darkest; and on how we are siblings in infinite love.
Many times, he repeatedly said: that love is God’s religion; mercy is God’s language; that we are God’s delight; that God wants us to be whole; and that we are to be whole, not perfect; that love never fails; that when love touches suffering, he turns suffering into mercy; that love never loses its way home; that there is no fear in love.
We may think that the messages are the same ones we have heard before. But Fr. Greg delivered them in a manner so differently—so simply and clearly—that it touches the soul. He also gave us many quiet moments to reflect and look into ourselves.
Fr. Greg also spoke on how Homeboy Industries touched the lives of many gang members in Los Angeles, California. Homeboy Industries is the largest gang rehabilitation and re-entry program in the world. For over 30 years, it has stood as a beacon of hope in Los Angeles, providing training and support to formerly gang-involved and previously incarcerated people, and allowing them to redirect their lives and become contributing members of our community. In LA alone today, they have around 500 “trainees” who report every day, and the movement has developed into a world-wide network.
We also heard testimonies of Hector and Steve, rehabilitated former gang members, who flew in with Fr. Greg, on how their lives were so remarkably touched by love and on how they have been transformed. We also heard from Fr. Greg many other stories, some even funny, but mostly mind-boggling to me, of gang members, their childhood traumas, their years in jail, but how Homeboy welcomed them with love and open arms.
What amazes me most is how Fr. Greg and his team in Homeboy not just deliver, but more importantly show, God’s message of love to those gang members. It is always the recognition and acceptance of that love which is the key to their conversion and change. And one would think that they are the only ones who need to hear those message and need to be “converted” or “convinced”.
We, who are in a much different world, need to be reminded as much or even more. Thus, Fr. Boyle’s message rang so loudly to all of the participants, and more particularly, to me.
Indeed, God is a God of love. He is greater than the God we settled for.
PS. Incidentally, Fr. Greg was given by Traditional University Award by the Ateneo de Manila University. He will also speak in a podcast in the Jesuit Hour of Radio Katipunan.
After having run on the average of 10 kilometers only since I started running when I turned 50, I decided to aim for a marathon shortly before I turned 60.
I aimed for the New York marathon, but could not get a slot. Thus, in February 2025, I joined The Bull Runner (TBR) marathon, the inclusive marathon for first timers in Muntinlupa (Filinvest), Manila.
I hired a coach and trained for a year, a period longer than the usual trainings for marathon. I survived the TBR, clocked decently, and ran my first full marathon at 60.
Entering an international marathon was still elusive though. Fortunately, I was able to get a slot for 2026 London Marathon through my elite-runner friend from Texas, USA, Maria Dofiles-Wicker, who was invited to run the marathon by the London running club. After getting the slot, I on-boarded my running coach, Miguel Lopez, again.
Since I ran my first marathon at 60, it took time and a village for me to prepare. Aside from getting a running coach, I went back to the gym and got a strength and conditioning trainer, and also went to see a physical therapist, who helped release my muscles especially when the trainings became so intensive.
There are no short cuts to train for marathons. I had to run at least three times a week, with a longer run on weekends. I had to do some speed drills too, to improve my speed. I joined runs, at progressive distances, before the marathon since I performed better in organized runs. Expectedly, as my training progressed, I ran better.
I was also careful with my diet, making sure I ate protein before and after runs among others.
London
Going to London for the marathon both excited me and made me anxious.
Two months before the marathon, the war in Middle East broke out. Thus, we had to change to an Asian airline (China Southern Airlines) to avoid going through Dubai in the middle east.
In Guangzhou, we missed our connecting flight to London because of a very-delayed Manila leg and had to stay in China for an additional 12 hours. Thus, we arrived only two days before the Marathon, and I did not have time to get over my jet lag. (Lesson learned: leave early enough).
In London, it helped greatly though that I was with a group of runners (elite at that), courtesy of Maria who was so excited to see me (it was the first time we saw each other since our college days in the University of San Carlos).
The Marathon
London marathon was one great party. It also broke world records. A total 60,512 runners started and exactly 59,830 finished, thereby registering a world record. Sabastian Sawe from Kenya also became the first man in history to complete a marathon in under two hours. (1:59:30)
But what most impressed me were the people—whether they be runners or cheerers. I was also so impressed with the organizers.
People were cheering at both side of the streets the entire stretch. I realized that the London Marathon is more of a local event than an international one. It was a big deal for the Londoners; it was a way for them to raise funds for their favorite charities; it was a way for them to find purpose and meaning. It was reported that a record-breaking £87.5 million was raised for charities in that marathon.
Our starting point was Greenwich Park in Greenwich, an affluent district located in south-east of London, and world renowned as home of global time (Greenwich Mean Time). Going there, we rode trains which were made free for all runners that morning.
The runners had multiple color-coded starting points and times. My waive was no. 12 and was to start around 10:45. Since my entry was a community entry, I was with many locals who ran for charities. Some runners were in wheelchairs; some were visually impaired or with hearing disabilities. It was so inspiring to be with them.
We ran through London’s scenic landmarks–Cutty Sark, Tower Bridge, Canary Wharf and the Embankment for the final miles and emotional moments. The finish line was right in front of the Buckingham Palace. Since we arrived only two days before the marathon, we did not have time to see London before that. Thus, I saw London for the first time on foot, while running the marathon. (It was our first time in London).
By my standards, I did well in the first 30kms, registered personal records for the 21k and 30k segments. Deliberately, I paced myself so as to avoid fatigue, but unavoidably, fatigue set in. My jet lag (I woke up 2 a.m. and couldn’t go back to sleep that day) took a toll. The last 12 kilometer became a huge challenge. So, I had to strategize to I finish, went on endurance mode, and pushed myself to run 3 minutes and walk 1 minute for the last challenging 10k.
I cannot help but cry when I saw my daughter shouting my name at kilometer 42 (yes, because for some reason, I ran an extra kilometer and finished at 43k). The last kilometer was also an ordeal, but seeing the Buckingham Palace and the finish line was exhilarating. Of course, I cried again as I crossed the finish line. It dawned on me—I just became an international marathon runner and earned my first Abbot World Marathon Major star at the age of 61.
Indeed, with the grace of God and determination, many things are possible.
I am very happy to be back 41 years after I graduated and 41 years after I also joined the Ten Outstanding Graduates of this University. Like this moment, it was a moment of pride and thanksgiving.
Before anything else, let me congratulate all of you: The Outstanding Leaders and Graduates of 2026. You have made it, and not just ordinarily; you made it with flying colors. That is why you are here. You are the cream of the crop! We are proud of all of you, and I am certain you have made your parents very proud.
As outstanding leaders and graduates, you were selected not just because of your academic achievements and excellence, but because you have made meaningful contributions through leadership service, character and involvement in the school and community.
This year’s awarding is historic, since it marks the celebration of the 40th USC Excellence Awards, a milestone that highlights four decades of honoring outstanding Carolinians.
This year’s theme: A Carolinian Legacy: Driven by Commitment, Defined through Leadership,” is so timely as well.
Three words immediately resonates to me: Legacy, Commitment and Leadership
Commitment
I know you have paid the price; that is why you are here; that is why you excelled. You paid the price of hard work, resilience, perseverance, and probably, with razor-sharp focus and determination. So, you probably know the meaning of commitment.
However, commitment may mean something much bigger. It may mean being committed to the following:
Values — excellences, professionalism, integrity
Purpose –the reason and meaning why you are doing something;
Goals – your aspirations and dreams
God
When you know the meaning of commitment: you do what it takes– that it everything starts with a DECISION—and then your actions will follow to pursue and face the consequences, even the downside of, the decision.
Leadership
We are in dire need of good leaders – leaders who not just inspire, but also leaders who walk their talk, lead by example, and work for the good of others (not themselves).
You are very fortunate – because I know each of you has the gift of talent and intelligence. But you are more ortunate that you are a Carolinian—molded by the values of the SVD – of living out the Scriptures by transforming creation through self-giving and dialogue.
All of these values will be what will make you a good leader and take you through the world out there, make you to be a cut above the rest, and enable you to navigate in this thing called life.
Navigating Life
Let me be blunt: You will be going out to a world which is imperfect, full of uncertainly, risks and bad news. Because of technology, you are also exposed to a barrage of information, many of which could be fake and false, including those which tell you what you must-have or what you must-do. Also, because of social media, you get to see more of how other people live or seem to live their lives, and thus, risk of comparing yourselves constantly with others and be sorry for yourselves.
Temptations are also high – temptations to get quick rich, to forget and compromise your Christian values
All these, plus the expectations of others, your parents and this university included, can be very overwhelming.
How do you then navigate?
Looking back, after 40 years, I learned that while many things are important, there are also many which are not. Also, that God’s ways are not our ways, but He knows what is best for us.
Let me then go through a few items or reminders.
Do not be afraid to take risks – Soar as high as you can; do not be afraid to take risks or leaps of faith; be brave. I recalled, one of the greatest risks I took was resigning from my job in SGV Cebu and going to Manila to go to Ateneo Law School as a full-time student, becoming dependent again on my kuripot Father’s budget. I still remember what I felt as I took that cab from the airport to my dorm. Going back to school for 4 years, when I already had a career in finance and accounting, was a big leap. But I would not have been where and who I am, had I not taken that risk.
It was also a leap of faith for me to run my first marathon at 60 and joined the iconic London marathon last month at 61 years of age.
Learn to accept things you cannot control and distinguish it from things you can control – I am sure that most of you are control freaks—because this is a common characteristic of leaders and achievers. We aim for things, and we want things to turn out the way we want them to be. But in life, there are many things outside our control – this even includes the weather. So, we should not waste our energy on those we cannot control; in fact, we should navigate and go around them.
My greatest lesson on this is when we found out our eldest has autism. That was entirely beyond our control, but we faced the challenge; we raised an autistic child. Now, Gino, who is 27, has very good self-help skills, has travelled, plays bowling and the guitar, and is employed.
Again, we should accept the things we cannot change and focus on what is within our control– ourselves, our actions, our responses, our spheres of influences.
Keep growing, learning, improving – So keep on working on yourself. Learn new skill, acknowledge what your lack and work on them.
I recalled that I was not good at writing. I was good in math and in numbers. As commerce students, we were trained to compute; however, we were not trained to write like the liberal arts students. Also, I graduated from schools in Dipolog City where my English and writing skills were not well developed. When I became a lawyer and had to write pleadings and opinions, my writing was so terrible! My thinking was too, of course.
I had to immerse myself in and read writing books. I recalled that the best booked that help me was a copywriting book—a book on how to rewrite paragraphs and sentences.
Foster your creativity and passions – I had always been artistic, but I placed my arts in the backseat, as I became extremely academic; it actually made me very unhappy.
Inside each of us is a child who is creative, expressive and curious. You need to express the passion, unleash the curiosity and creativity of that child, and weave them into your life. Because that will also make you complete and whole; it also the way to unleash your potential.
Develop critical thinking – Being a top graduate, I am sure you have good minds. However, having a good mind and being a thinker—a critical thinker—are two different things.
Critical thinking is the disciplined process of analyzing facts, evidence, and arguments to form sound, rational, and unbiased judgments. It requires questioning assumptions, recognizing biases, and evaluating information from multiple perspectives before reaching conclusions.
It requires analysis before jumping into conclusions; it requires deferring judgment, until the facts are duly analyzed.
Nowadays, it is so easy to follow the band wagon, to be influenced by what we see and hear from others, and then, to immediately judge. It takes wisdom and a critical mind to sift through all the information and make sound judgments.
Stick to your values
Be honest; never give in to corruption; choose to be honest, even if it is the narrow road. Avoid the temptation of quick wealth.
I cannot over-emphasize this. It is very sad to see that many of our leaders are corrupt. It will be more sad to see one of our graduates, especially one of our top graduates, to be the same and be embroiled in dishonest and corrupt means.
So, please do not be corrupt and do not give in to corruption.
I have been in practice for tax and corporate law for 33 years. I am proud to say, I never bribed the BIR nor been a conduit for such for my clients. If my clients want to bribe, I step aside and get out. It was a decision I made long time ago; and it is not going to change now. I always say, I don’t want to feed my children with stolen money.
Tax can be practiced correctly and honestly; companies can be tax compliant and need not give in to corruption. There is a way; we do not have to join the band wagon.
Know your purpose
Lastly, know your whys. Know and do the things that excite you and give you meaning; things that inspire you and make you wake up in the morning
I recalled that during the interview I had with the panel of judges, I was asked what was my reason for achieving—because I had always been an over-achiever– and I was not able to answer. I don’t even know how I still landed in TOG without giving a good answer to that question.
Do you know yours? Do you know why are you are here? Do you know why you did what you did and have been doing? Do you know your motivations?
I am sure you have dreams and goals. And I tell you, keep dreaming because dreams can come true.
But be careful—because if you do not have the right motivations or reasons, or a good understanding of your whys, the world out there will tire and disappoint you, and you will miss the point.
Remember, your reasons and whys should be bigger than yourselves or your situation– they should lead you to become the best persons that you can be and live a full life, and then, glorify God.
God has plans us, plans for good and not for woe. Plans which will be for His greater glory and for the greater common good—service to others. Our purpose is to fulfill that plan—His Plan. That is the bigger picture. And it is when you have the bigger picture before you, that you don’t get lost in the woods. Let me share Romans 8:28—all things work for good for those who love Christ and called according to his purpose.
I repeat: It is when you have and know the bigger picture that you do not get lost in the woods of this thing called LIFE.
Be A Cut Above the Rest
You are all gifted; you are all outstanding and are recognized as such. But remember: when more is given, more is also expected.
So, carry your crosses– be the leader who leads by example, a leader who sticks to the Christian values that this University espouses, a leader who dreams and thinks, but at the same time a leader who is compassionate, kind and emphatic.
Don’t be ordinary, do not just follow the band wagon, be your own trail blazer and strive to be a cut above the rest, a positive influencer in your spheres of influence. Because being able to positively influence other’s lives is one of the most fulfilling endeavor and privilege one can have.
Break the glass ceiling – do not ever think that you are inferior. When I went to Manila, especially at that time, when I knew that they would sometimes look down at us, probinsianos. But I just broke the glass ceiling–became no. 2 of my batch on the first semester—and the rest is history. Believe that if others can do it, so can you.
Believe that as a Carolinian, you are world class!
Be Grateful
But let me give you a last note: do not forget to enjoy the journey—the DAILY journey, in prayer and in faith. Do not forget to be grateful and appreciate what you have. Do not forget to give thanks; do not forget to be happy for who you are and what you have. Do not forget to pray incessantly.
Remember, that sometimes, the process or experience itself is the purpose or end, especially if, as a result, they make us better persons. Because if the experience—any experience for that matter—makes us better persons, then the purpose, HIS purpose, would have been achieved. In reality, in the end, it is all about Him; it is all for His greater glory.
Thus, finally, always trust in God’s providence; believe in His love for you; and acknowledge that we are nothing without Him. Because when the going gets tough, when the future sometimes looks dim, when sometimes we fail to meet our dreams, or when reality is not what we want it to be, it is only in truly believing in God’s love for us that we can move on, accept, find meaning and have peace. And God will not disappoint.
Indeed, it is a privilege to meet all of you today. With young leaders like you before us, I feel hopeful, I feel that there is hope in this world, there is hope in this country; there is hope for the future, because that future is in your hands.
Go Carolinians! Lead, leave a legacy, and commit your ways to God.
Godspeed and God bless you all!
Delivered at the 40th Excellence Awards of USC, May 28, 2026.
I used to not share much about the challenges we faced as we raised our eldest son, Gino, who has autism, because I would rather share positive things, than negative ones; I also did not want to seek sympathy or pity. Occasionally though, I did share how we raised him to friends and others at social gatherings or when the opportunity called for it. However, to help younger parents who may be facing the same challenges and to inspire them, I thought it is about time I put in writing what we learned in raising Gino.
Gino, who is now 26, was diagnosed when he was just two years old. At that time, he did not speak even a single word, had very poor eye contact, had prolonged tantrums, and played with the same toys repeatedly. Since he was the eldest, we had no one to compare him with and thought he was a regular child. But my brother, who is a doctor, saw the alarming signs and eventually, convinced me to have Gino checked and diagnosed.
Gino was an easy case to diagnose, because he was a “classic”—he had and displayed almost all of the signs or symptoms of one in the autism spectrum. We couldn’t be in denial. It was devastating and daunting then.
However, after years of intervention, Gino has become such a lovable, soft-mannered and loving young man, with very good self-help skills. He has gone a very long way, and we are extremely proud of him.
He is now gainfully employed, in two jobs. Once a week, he works as a server at Walkie Talkie Coffee Shop in Dasmariñas, Cavite, and thrice a week he reports to the Alabang Office of APKI (Asia Primera Kimika, Inc.). He plays bowling, can publicly commute in certain areas, knows how to cook, and manages our household finances.
But what he is and has become today is a sum of so many factors.
In the overall, it requires acceptance, humility, tons of patience, focus, determination, and resources to raise a special child. I would thus like to share our learnings.
Accept – We have to accept if our child has special needs. This is the first thing to do as parents, and the most difficult one, because we think these things will not happen to us. We start being incredulous, angry, lost and confused. However, in the end, we have to face the challenge, no matter how daunting. Accepting the situation is key because knowing the problem and understanding it is crucial in solving any problem. The parents’ denial of the problem is, for me, the greatest stumbling block to a child’s development. In denying, the parents will deprive the child of what he or she really needs—a proper intervention at the earliest possible time. As parents, we are the key to their development. Unfortunately, we can also be the greatest obstacles.
Be humble – A child with special needs has special needs which have to be met and addressed by professionals and a good intervention program. As parents, we are not trained to handle special kids. No matter how good or successful we are in our fields of work, we are not experts when it comes to special children or their intervention. So, the key is to have a good team of professionals, to listen to them, and to try to learn as much. Although in the end, we, as parents, make the final decision on many matters, like the choice of school, frequency and mix of intervention, etc., we have to make said decisions in an informed and intelligent manner as much as practicable. We can do that when we know how to listen and recognize that we need help from the experts. That is humility.
Provide resources – Do not scrimp on the intervention costs; go for the best therapists, the best team you can afford. Investing on a good team and a good program will be the best decision you can make, not just for your child, but also for his or her siblings. We sought the highly-recommended therapists, even if they were more expensive than others. We went to the best developmental pediatrician in the country, Dr. Alexis Reyes.. She played a very crucial role in leading us to the best therapists and in forming, as well as in implementing, Gino’s intervention program. We also hired a full time “shadow teacher”, who was a college graduate.
Get a good support team and home program – Aside from a good team of professionals, make sure you have a good team at home. Do not leave your child with just the yaya, much more an untrained one. As mentioned, we hired a full-time college graduate who acted as Gino’s shadow teacher, went with him in all his therapy sessions, and repeated his sessions at home. His yaya was also trained by his therapists. We replicated at home what his therapists did in his therapy sessions. We had one of our bedrooms converted into a therapy room, where Gino and his shadow teacher, Teacher Jo, would spend hours to repeat his sessions. There were years when we had home programs, and his professional therapists from Shine Intervention Center would visit our house to check what we were doing at home. When our house was new, we placed gym equipment (trampoline, monkey bars and large swings) at our basement so his occupational therapy sessions could be replicated.
Know the Program – Despite having a good team, do not leave to the therapists all that is needed to be done. Know what they are doing, know the program and collaborate with them closely.
Handle Your Child – I was told early on that we, the parents, are the permanents in the team. The others are temporary—they will soon leave you. So, we have to be able to handle our children ourselves. I remembered that one time, I complained to Gino’s therapist that he seemed not to listen to me. Then, I was told bluntly that I was having authority issues: Mommy is to play with, teacher is to be followed. So, I took over—brought him out alone, without yaya, driver or teacher. for several instances– and established my authority over him.
Expose Your Child – We never cloistered Gino. We brought him to parties, trips, malls, etc., and allowed him to go on campings and pursue his interests. He does bowling and bikes around the village. He also talks to neighbors and visits their home, etc. Thus, he is very popular among our neighbors. He has travelled with us locally and overseas. He has even taken a flight alone to the province. He was trained to commute with a tricycle inside BF homes. He has taken jeepneys, p2p buses and vans, and now can commute from his work to the house.
Believe and dream, but be realistic – Autism has no cure, so Gino will always be in the spectrum, a fact we have to accept. He is not a savant, but he has skills and assets. He can never be like a regular kid, but he is doing well as one with autism. We did not push him to finish college anymore, although he finished high school in Create Learning Paths. He has taken TESDA courses on Microsoft word and excel. He has also taken a course on coffee brewing by UCC Coffee Academy and cooking in his therapy class in Candent. He was trained basic accounting, and thus, manages our house disbursements. He has done on-the-job trainings, and now is employed by APKI Philippines. He has also been trained as an alter server and serves our parish masses. However, he may never be as independent like a regular person. He will always have difficulty socially and in communicating verbally. He will still have difficulty in managing his stress, since his stress tolerance is low. Thus, we will have to continue to support him. In the end, we aim for him to have a meaningful, fulfilling and happy life—a simple life, but hopefully, a happy and contented one.
The impact of having a special child on one is enormous. It may be beyond one’s understanding, especially at the start. However, looking back, I realized that we were never left alone; that God took care of us, especially Gino; that we were guided; and that there were so many people, including dedicated therapists and doctors, who helped us along the way.
Having a special child is still a wonderful gift and blessing. As parents, we just have to do our best and face the challenge and reality. In the process, we enable our child to become the best person he or she can be. As a fringe benefit, we also become better persons ourselves and the best parents that we can be.
I will be 60 this year, the year of the Dragon, and I am yet to run my first full marathon. I started running at 50 and I got stuck with 10-kilometer runs for nine years. Last year, I broke the 10-kilometer streak with my first 10 miler or 16-kilometer run (31st Yakult Run). Also, early this year, I did the 24-kilometer scenic but challenging Cebu Marathon run. It occurred to me that I should “up” my standards and aim to do a full marathon (at least once in my life). So, I got a coach (Miguel Lopez) to help me with it.
I had always been running at intervals -one minute run and one minute walk- until my coach said I should do three minute runs (to which I objected at first, of course). However, now he wants me to do a continuous three-kilometer run (what??). I never ran as much in my entire life, and yet, he thinks I am not running enough.
My coach gave me a program (which I don’t totally follow). And I argue against him. I guess I am not an easy student.
As I ran my second 10-miler in the West Philippine Sea run held yesterday, July 7, 2024, I asked myself, why am I doing this? Then, my reasons crystalized: foremost of which is vanity (I don’t want to get fat); second, I want to be healthy and live long (because if you have a special child, you want to live long); and third, it’s actually fun and the energy of a run (because of the rush of the adrenalin in all the runners, which can be in thousands) is euphoric.
In any case, this year, I registered for the TBR (the Bull Runner) Dream Marathon 2025. So, I should be able to do my first marathon early next year, God willing. I am still mulling at which international marathon to aim for. My conditions: no strict cut off, and it should be scenic and fun. Any suggestions?
In any case, I need to lose a few more pounds and gain more muscle (and do more distance, per my coach). On the other hand, my coach has to be more patient (and strategic) with me. But more importantly, I need to keep running!
Good luck to my knees. (I will buy more running shoes!).
